-_- Have you ever heard that everything in LA is only about 20 minutes away from the Downtown area? LIES! ALL LIES! Today I had to get to my doctor’s appointment and it took me FOREVER! It should never take over 40 minutes to get less than 20 miles. Traffic was everywhere. I couldn’t escape it. If we are all going in the same direction, why , oh why is it so slow and crowded on the freeway???! Does anyone know the answer? Can you phone a friend or ask the audience for assistance on this one? It is that person on their phone? Is it that older person too afraid to go over 55 in the fast lane? Tip old man, get the heck over or take the streets bro! Could it be that person with nowhere to go? Well I have somewhere to go, so how about you get out of my way. Maybe it’s that person that still picks their nose…in public…in their car…with no tinted windows. Gross. Just gross.
You know another thing I can’t stand is the fact that part of the drive will be bumper to bumper; keeps you thinking there must be a huge accident. Like when you’re on the 405 (or the slow-05 as it’s affectionately nicknamed) and traffic just appears around Jefferson Blvd. and continues through Westwood and up the hill. Then you reach Sherman Oaks, and viola! It’s clear. No more traffic. Where is the body and car that looks like a crumpled up bag of chips? Oh. It’s not there. Just traffic- for no reason. What’s worse is when there is an accident and it’s pulled all the way over to the side, but my fellow citizens of the world think it is their right to be the nosiest creatures and slow down to look at what’s happening. STOP BEING NOSY AND DRIVE! Oh..oh, how about the accident on the OPPOSITE side of the freeway? It’s not even on OUR SIDE. You’ve got to be kidding me. I’m usually on the verge of cussing at this point. It’s a real Jesus take the wheel moment. We should have been past this point on the road 20 minutes ago. The accident isn’t on the side of the freeway we are driving on, but you just have to know what is going on in someone else’s life. It’s not like you’re going to go help. Are you really going to go do CPR or offer your services? No. No you aren’t. So just keep driving and pray for the best.
Don’t get me wrong. I really don’t mind traffic (hard to believe from this post, I’m sure). I used to drive for Lyft. Some of these scenarios just turn my brain to mush due to how idiotic the circumstances tend to be. I just want LA to hurry up and have better, more connected mass transportation. I promise I’ll use and help to decrease my carbon footprint and keep one more irritated driver off the freeway.
Does LA traffic or traffic in your area drive you up the wall? What do you do to stay sane on the road? Share in the comments below!